Big Brother Australia Housemates: First Impressions

BIG BROTHER AUSTRALIA re-launched this week on Channel Nine and it’s much of the same. But at least we have 14 new personalities we can shamelessly judge for the next 3 months. Here’s my first impressions.

Monday night marked the return of the iconic Big Brother series to Australian television screens. At first look the series hasn’t changed. There’s a horrible new logo, a new host and that’s about it. We have a bunch of white people and the one ethnic minority. Don’t let my description fool you, I’m actually excited for the next 3 months.

Let’s take a look at the 14 new housemates we will grow to love and hate.

Michael

Age: 26

Michael is a bit of a character, but he knows he is and he milks it. I laughed at his first two quirky remarks when he was the first housemate to enter on Monday, night then immediately grew tired of him. He is trying too hard and is very aware of the cameras. Since then I’ve started to warm to him because he does seem quite educated and he was very upset at being called a bogan because he can’t stand them apparently. So good for him, I hope he continues to grow on me. But I can tell a lot of Australia already likes this guy, I think he may be a contender to win.

His Secret: My guess is the high IQ related secret.

Layla

Age: 24

Layla is my favourite so far, really only because of her accent. That novelty may wear off quite quickly. Upon first hearing her introduce herself on the launch show, I thought she was deaf. It turns out she was just from Manchester. She seems quite friendly and charismatic but I guess all girls at the start wear their smiles till someone steps in their way. I see boy problems ahead with Layla and fellow housemates.

Her potential hook-up: Ryan, but I see her having to compete with Stacey.

Benjamin

Age: 32

Our eldest housemate and the biggest mouth by the looks of it. Within the first few hours Ben managed to offend Michael by calling him a bogan after Ben felt offended by Michael pigeon-holing him as ‘gay’. Ben‘s was one of the more flamboyant entrances I witnessed so far with his hands and the hips and quite a few poses before actually shaking hands with anyone. I know we will get some pure entertainment from Ben in the early stages as he will most likely be a constant shit stirrer.

His secret: My guess, hasn’t had a girlfriend since he was 11.

Zoe

Age: 23

The racist from the country. In her intro video she said she was outspoken and didn’t like boat people. Well the loud mouth hasn’t really left her mark as of yet or really any impression. She said to Big Brother she doesn’t like to speak over people and so she is finding it hard. Speak up, if there’s ever a time it should be in the first few days. Maybe she will come out of her shell later in the season or most likely be eliminated before that happens.

Ryan

Age: 21

The model with a law degree. He doesn’t seem like as a big of a douchebag (in the house) as his intro tape made him out to be but he is a bit too confident. He rated himself a 9.5 out 10 so he lost all credibility from the get go. The only reason I see him as a lesser douchebag is because of the next guy…

Ray

Age: 25

He already has pussy in the palm of his hand, OH! No for reals, this guy seems like the lord of the douchebags, having a hissy fit over the lack of chocolate milk in the house and slamming the fridge door upon this realisation after only being in the house for a few minutes made him my most hated housemate so far. I’m happy with that. I need a villian. Continue on douchelord.

His secret: I was tossing up between Ray and Ryan if either of them dated/slept wit the 100 women secret. But I think since Ryan basically confirmed he is scared of birds on Wednesday night’s episode I would say Ray is linked to the 100 women secret.

Stacey

Age: 24 (If I didn’t read the website/hear her mention her age on the show I would say 32)

Thursday night’s episode let me know that Stacey is irritating and an attention seeking whore. I also learnt she is 24 and not 32 (I don’t blame Bradley for saying he thought she was older, you weren’t the only one). I found her amusing in the first few days but she’s moved on to the loud mouth who gets upset, says she isn’t upset then proceeds to tell everyone in the house how she isn’t upset, and how it isn’t a big deal. She’ll have a screaming match with someone within the first 3 weeks, I promise.

Bradley

Age: 18

I don’t feel sorry for people who are socially awkward and apply for Big Brother, I really don’t. Bradley is that person, trying hard to fit in with the group and failing. Too opinionated about real world issues to fit in with the majority of the airheads. Hopefully he finds his place but I don’t see that happening after Stacey making him an enemy of a few of the girls with her overdramatic personality. Bradley didn’t even care he offended her. I hope he continues to offend, it’ll keep us all entertained and hating on Stacey even more.

His secret: Juvenile offender? I really don’t know, this could make him more interesting.

Estelle

Age: 23

She is a law student/rapper/skater. Her description is more interesting than she has been so far but I see the potential in her. She might be the heartbreaker because she seems flirtatious but completely unaware of what she is doing at the same time. She has caught Bradley‘s eye but Josh caught her waist on Thursday night’s episode so we’ll see how this little minx continues.

I left the boring people till last…MY VANILLA CATEGORY

Josh

Age: 28

Thinks he’s king shit and he isn’t. He thinks he is leader of the house, he shouldn’t be and they shouldn’t let him. Thinks he can get Estelle, well look I don’t know how that will turn out but we will see in days to come. He’s a tool in the worst sense, he loves himself but isn’t outspoken, we NEED to like or hate you, being neutral makes for bad TV and he should be sent packing.

His secret: He’s boring, OH! no I think he has been fired from every job he has ever had. I think he thinks he is too good for his jobs/hasn’t really had any.

Charne

Age: 31

Her problem is she looks more fun than she is. I get taking the back seat while all the young loud mouths have their say and work out their place in the house but once again taking the back seat makes for bad TV. I potentially see Charne packing her bags and leaving within two weeks if things don’t change. Even at the dinner on Thursday she looked like she couldn’t have given any less fucks about what was going on.

George

Age: 25

He smiles a lot. That’s about all I got. The camera hasn’t spent too much time with George, so I can’t say a whole lot. He seems like a nice guy but he may just be playing it that way since he has only been there for two days. I thought it was hilarious that the girls had him on their whiteboard as the juvenile offender.

His secret though: Multi millionaire! The tabloids said so. You can always trust them.

Angie

Age: 21

Babe, babe, babe. That’s all I’ve heard her say. Her advice to Bradley wasn’t even sincere on Thursday nights show, she just wanted to put her two cents in to the whole situation. She isn’t really doing a lot. I’d like to see her with a bit of drink in her, she could get a bit wild. But until then she’s on my NEEDS TO GO list.

Sarah

Age: 30

She is trying to act like the mother but it’s doing her no favours. She hasn’t had much air time since the first episode and from the glimpses we get I can see why. Not a whole lot going on there. She is one of those wasted spaces. Kick her out and send in an intruder (Not a white woman, there’s plenty).

There they are. Anyone you already hate? See any potential hookups?

Not a whole lot has changed but then maybe it shouldn’t have, maybe all we needed was a break.

Check out more on Big Brother‘s website.

Words by Dan.

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